Here Again Now by award-winning author Okechukwu Nzelu is both heart-rending and memorable. Carried by impeccable lyrical writing, the 2022 novel examines themes of queerness, grief, friendship, and family. Set in the United Kingdom with hints of Nigerian life, this enthralling book reads like capricious weather.
The beginning parts are an emerging sunshine with birds chirping freely. The middle parts are sudden rain clouds gathered brewing with grief, regret, and confusion. Towards the end of the novel, rainbows blossom with hope and healing.
The Story
Ekene and Achike are young and gifted Nigerian-British gay men navigating the stresses brought by London life. A connection that started when they were twelve years old. Here Again Now is a story of two childhood friends who grew to love each other sincerely.
Nzelu’s pen writes these complex and misunderstood characters with incredible compassion and tenderness. Ekene is deeply in love with Achike but still troubled by his childhood traumas. He was a victim of parental neglect and a cold war misdirected to him as a child. “They fought Ekene instead- the mother battled what she saw of the father in him, the father battled the mother in him.”
Achike is facing similar childhood battles and arbitrary migraines. He is a recluse and emotionally unavailable but longs to be loved and shown affection, particularly by his father- Chibuike.
These three male characters essentially hold the novel’s premise and plot. They query the fear amongst men -particularly black African men- in showing vulnerability towards other men as if a virus that leaves irreparable damage to the soul. “Decades had gone by, and not a single hug for the boy. He couldn’t find a way. But he ached to do it. What else was he for? How long could he live like this, a father without a son to love?”
The Current Situation on the African Continent
The fear, animosity, and lack of knowledge about homosexuality amongst traditional African men and communities is sadly evident in our current times.
In most of Africa - 33 out of 55 countries - homosexuality is a crime punishable by imprisonment, according to the Institute for Security Studies (ISS). In 2023 alone, Kenya, Ghana, Namibia, Niger, Tanzania, and Uganda took steps to tighten their anti-homosexuality laws, the institute further reports. Although LGBTI+ rights are more liberal in other countries like the UK, discrimination and stigma still exist among African communities.
Due to the skewed patriarchal and cultural notions in African communities, men like Chibuike find themselves in unfamiliar territories relating to his gay son and gay friend. Conflicted, lonely, and dealing with loss, Chibuike buries his fears and regrets at the bottom of beer bottles. As a traditional Nigerian father now in a foreign land, he is forced to reevaluate these archaic notions due to Ekene and Achike's profound friendship.
Important Take Aways
The book makes the case that men must have the will to challenge patriarchal stereotypes towards being better fathers. Be it the son is gay, unemployed, or wants to embrace a different religion, they are still sons to their fathers. Therefore compassion and understanding arise through more open intergenerational conversations about unversed topics becomes vital.
For some traditional African men to hear “Dad, I am gay” from their sons or daughters may come as a shock. This novel serves insights and preparations for that enviable conversation if such presents itself in the household.
The novel prompts men to cultivate a language to show love and affection for their sons- gay or not. To be strong and hard all the time is a missed opportunity to experience the full spectrum of human emotions. If men refuse to express their sensitive side how are we to engage better with loved ones as fathers, sons, brothers, and uncles? How are we to be better leaders in society when one area of our emotional capabilities is unexplored?
Here Again Now is recommended to fathers, sons, and women alike seeking to understand how men battle with the realities of homosexuality, gender norms, child trauma, and grief.
About the reviewer
Rolland "Simpi" Motaung
Rolland “Simpi” Motaung is an entrepreneur, facilitator, and freelance arts writer. He is passionate about entrepreneurship, education, creative arts, and gender studies, particularly from an African context.
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